The Sports Hernia Blog

The Vikings new stadium designed by Joel Osteen

Forget public financing and PSL's ... the new Vikings stadium looks like it was built by a bunch of poor saps who were told to obey God or something.

[Photo via Reddit]

Boomer & Carton had a little fun with Jets quarterback "Geno Davis"

Geno Davis? Yikes. Even referring to him as Gene Smith, which changes the entire perception of everything that is the name Geno Smith, would've been more acceptable.

Even better, the "article" was posted on the Boomer & Carton page on CBS New York at 6:15am this morning and, as of now, it remains Geno Davis.

[via CBS New York; h/t Matty B.]

Tim Tebow just the latest QB to revive Big Foot buzz

Our friends at Hugging Harold Reynolds might be onto something here. The alarming photo immediately brought back eery memories of a similar moment in 2008 that we still haven't been able to shake. Sadly, the only thing we were able to confirm at the time was that Kerry Collins is indeed half wolf.

Hernia's Greatest Hits: Mel Kiper, Todd McShay trade hair in draft day shocker

Hernia's Greatest Hits: Pasquarelli takes combover to new level

This shocking photo of Len Pasquarelli made it's way around the internet yesterday but it wasn't until now that we were able to stop staring at our screens like cavemen and process what it was that we were looking at.

While initially thinking this was the greatest see-through toupee we've ever seen, one writer here was able to reel it back in and put it together:

"I don't think thats a toupee," said esteemed writer Gerrard Sir Hornypants.  "I think its one of those deals where he stubbornly refuses to just shave his head so the sporadic wave of hair gives that surreal effect."

Whether it's a toupee, an extremely rad combover, a massive spiderweb or simply smoke rising from his head, this could easily be one of the most defiant moves on the decade.

It almost looks as if a panicked producer, in fear of his bald dome, placed a bunch of dryer sheets on his head right before he went on camera.

While we've affectionately nicknamed Dick Stockton "smokehair," this Pasquarelli sighting might be cause to reevaluate things because Stockton's smoking head looks like harmless child's play compared to the hazy cloud of smoke that is this man's hair.

Huge kid crushes regular sized kid in pee wee football game

 

When interviewed, huge kid calls NFL comish Roger Goodell a 'pussy'.

Fact: Kids don't know shit about anything

Need anymore proof? With any luck Tim Tebow will show up to the Nickelodeon Kids Choice Awards ceremony and lose his virginity to Moose while Alistair hides in a locker and records it on a Pixelvision. 

Team Bellringers clearly living in the past

Like the New England Patriots, the fantasy footballing Bellringers are sadly living in the past. Not only have they not found glory since 2008, they were put on probation last season for trading Larry Fitzgerald for a Hot Stone Massage Groupon and a half-eaten meatball sub after the team tragically banked their fortunes on Michael Vick.

[Photo via Reddit]

Andy Reid's stomach announces Alex Smith signing

As psyched as Andy Reid was to announce the signing of Alex Smith, he couldn't help but overhear a local Chiefs blogger and beat reporter talk about the wonder of the new Doritos Locos taco. When asked about a potential backup for Smith, Reid's stomach responded, "grrrr bubble bubble, bletch, pfffffft, pop."

In other news, Reid's stomach issued a stern "no comment" and his belly button became enraged when he was once again asked about those pesky beaver allegations.

[Photo via Sports Illustrated]

Roger Goodell better watch this video

 

Next time Roger Goodall and Bob Kraft bring up the absurd idea of the NFL having a team in the UK, someone should point them to this video. In fairness, this looks like the equivelent of asking a bunch of US high school football players from Ohio what they thought of the last episode of Downton Abbey.