In an effort to liven an up an old gameroom favorite, Rangers legend and notorious coochie whisperer recently introduced his own line of Air Hockey tables. The Ron Duguay Bone Zone Three-way Table Hockey System puts a new spin on air hockey, as the table is shaped like a vagina and requires a three-some instead of the customary head-to-head action. Authentic Duguay-grade chest hair even pops up through the air holes when goals are scored, and the game paddles are actually edible (and come in three flavors: strawberry, cherry and Duguay).
Dugauy has also promised to conduct personal one-on-one home delivery of the tables in the New York Metro area from the hours of 10 AM - 4 PM Monday through Friday. He just asks that customers put out the customary purple thong on the front door handle.
BRISTOL, CT -- Notorious face contortionist, Skip Bayless, has let the cat out of the bag and finally turned into a werewolf on live television. The somewhat startling, but mostly predictable transformation took place this morning on ESPN's wildly fresh and never redundant program, "First Take," leaving the always squirrely Jay Crawford scampering for his imaginary notes and Tim "Legs" Legler with a "can you believe this shit?" look on his face. Sources say Bayless "de-wolfed" when a a quick thinking ESPN intern named Darren changed the topic on the teleprompter from LeBron James to college lacrosse.
Whenever we describe this site to people, we're often tempted to say it's a sports site about nothing, which is exactly what it's been as of late. But in reality, it really wouldn't be proper to use that line even if we wanted to, for that line belongs to Jerry Cougar Mellencamp. So alas, we're often left with saying it's a site about ... something. Just like the key to last night's Angels-A's game was ... "SOMETHING."
Sadly, or rather hilariously, the downtrodden season of Albert Pujols has apparently already manged to depress an otherwise zesty television producer to the point they've been completely zapped of ideas, in mid-May no less.
Massive bonus points are in order for TNT's Ernie Johnson, who opened the embarrassing clip of cantankerous Rondo with the "hot under the collar" line. That's about as close as you'll get to Ernie blatantly mocking a player, so soak it up while you can. If you translated his comment to Charles Barkley bluntness, it would go something like, "that's a sweet orange collar, you inexcusable, unhinged jackass."
And we totally agree, that's a really cool jacket. Looks like something Barbie might wear to the club in 1985.
The portly Angels first baseman is batting .208 with 5 RBIs, zero home runs and a putrid OPS that would even make little Jason Tyner cry. Cosmo Kramer's infamous words of "look away, I'm hideous" sound awfully poignant right about now. Frankly, so does the word awfully.
On the bright side, there are only nine years remaining on Al B. Sure's deal. Chin up, Angel fans.
Nothing changes an average game like Betting Online. When you have a stake in the outcome of a contest, a typical match can become a memorable event. One might say that it's even more fun than a sports hernia...
and you could come away with some extra cash! The only better feeling than winning is having extra pocket money.