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After a frightened Redd spotted the disturbing and sometimes blinding sight of Swift's pasty legs during Wednesday night's game, he remained stuck in this classic 'Double Dribble' pose for over 30 seconds.
Tyronn Lue, who foolishly viewed Swift's legs on the Jumbotron, took the worst of it as he is still frozen on the Buck's bench with his mouth agape.
At least it's familiar territory.
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By Joshua Bacott
When word came out earlier this month that Cowboys owner Jerry Jones and Yankees owner George Steinbrenner were going into business together in a private venture, the possibilities were endless. The bombastic heads of two of the most prominent professional sports franchises in the world were joining egos to dominate yet another industry.
God only knows what they were going to be selling.
Were they starting a consulting service on how to publicly neuter successful coaches for personal entertainment?
Maybe they were going to charge rich gamesmen thousands of dollars to hunt street bums that they rounded up for sport. Honestly a modern-day Running Man scenario sounded like something you’d expect when you find out the Boss and Jerry were incahoots.
And then they announced that the big intimidating business featuring two of the most powerful men in sports as its founders was going to be… a concession management company. Steinbrenner and Jones are basically going to start a catering business.
More specifically, they’ve formed Legends Hospitality, whose primary responsibility initially is going to be providing concessions for the new versions of Yankee Stadium and Texas Stadium that are set to be unveiled in 2009.
Continue reading "Joe Sports Fan Presents... Legends Hospitality: The Menu" »
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And the confident little guy knows it too, he's basically laughing in your face, taunting each and every one of you horny souls that obsess over this chick. It's no accident that the scroll is discussing someone with their pants down, the scroll knows what you're doing.
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I know most of you fans will not read this since the majority of Philly is either still wasted or in the local drunk tank, but...
Hey Phillies fans, FUCK YOU!
This World Series sucked, and I was torn about whom to root for and I actually decided on the Phillies because the Rays averaged 14,000 fans this year and those fans didn’t deserve a trip to the World Series.
Also, I kind of like Ryan Howard, Chase Utley and Jimmy Rollins - they all seem like good dudes. But let me just say this right now: the Phillies' fans do not deserve those players or this title.
So congrats to the players, they played a great postseason. To the fans: get FUCKED. You are a bunch of zero class citizens in sports and in life. If the founding fathers knew Philly fans were going to turn out this way, they would have signed the Declaration of Independence in Trenton and nicknamed Philly the City of White Trash Degenerates.
Last night, when Bud Selig was introduced, he was booed mercilessly and that is despicable. I get it, he may have made a poor decision, but you guys just won so shut the fuck up. Your shitty town hasn’t won a championship (of any kind excluding that arena football shit) in 25 years, so either cheer or stick a thumb up your ass.
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Maybe this'll become a yearly thing for good old Rudy, especially since his beloved Yankees keep forgetting to win the World Series every year.
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The poll shrunk the snot out of the image, full size is after the jump...
Continue reading "The Sonics were a lot cooler when they were the Sonics" »
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Take off the drinking helmet there, bud. (thanks to Nationalcoholic at Deadspin for the clutch image pull) *** Close, but not quite there yet. Is 'YankeesJets2375' actually The GARV typing under another one of his many aliases? After all, they are trying to kill him.
Past commenting gems:
Brady #12 patch zing - 9/11/08
Braves 1-run win zing - 7/7/08
AL pitcher grand slam zing - 6/24/08
Full contact golf zing - 6/4/08
Spurs fans sleeping zing - 5/22/08
New Mexico's 'hungry wolves' zing - 3/5/08
Fist fights, love fest zing - 2/15/08
Marbury Tin-man zing - 1/23/08
Kobe charged zing - 1/11/08
Cowboys 'Cowgirls' zing - 12/8/07
Vince Carter zing - 11/12/07
Orioles football zing - 8/23/07
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After putting up our post on Monday night about the fascinating face painter we've been spotting at the Phillies World Series games, we received multiple comments from people claiming to know who this complete lunatic man is. It turns out, the commenters were right, it is in fact Jim Korman of Korman Residential Suites and Apartments.
So then we figured, why not see if this guy is willing to answer a few questions about his captivating presence behind home plate? Shockingly, he said yes. So contrary to our interviews with Barbaro, Jimmy Clausen, and the Patriots bored punter, this interview is actually real:
The Sports Hernia: Let's get this out of the way right off the bat: Seinfeld fan?
Jim Korman: Yes, I like Seinfeld. Even though it had nothing at all to do with my face painting, the clip you sent is maybe the funniest clip I’ve ever seen. I had actually forgotten about it. It is priceless.
TSH: And this one too: Ultimate Warrior or Sting?
JK: I don’t know Ultimate Warrior or Sting. My wrestling knowledge gets sketchy after Andre the Giant, Jimmy ‘Superfly’ Snuka, Haystacks Calhoun, and Frank The Animal Steele. Sorry.
(Hernia note: It's actually George "The Animal" Steele, not Frank, but Haystacks Calhoun? Holy turnbuckle-tits! He totally redeemed himself with that one.)
TSH: It's been said you just started doing this painting ritual. What made you start doing it for the World Series games?
JK: I actually decided to go with the ‘War Paint’ because these games are different than all the others I attend during the season. It just didn’t feel right heading to the ballpark as if it was “just another game.” It’s not. I had to do SOMETHING big to recognize the enormous importance of our Phillies ending this drought!
Continue reading "Hernia Exclusive: An Interview with Creepy Face Painter guy (seriously)" »
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Great start for Portland. This is one hell of a headline to kick off the NBA season, exactly how Blazer fans drew it up:
"Oden hurts foot, Blazers lose to Lakers"
Poor Portland, what a disaster. Hopefully it's minor and he doesn't become the Brawny Paper Towel guy version of Grant Hill.
Some headlines the people of Portland probably would have preferred to see in their local paper over the Oden one:
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Excerpt from the article:
As you're getting ready for Halloween on Friday, you should keep in mind a warning issued recently by the Food and Drug Administration about decorative contact lenses.
You should also keep in mind that if you're considering decorative contact lenses like these, you fucking suck. And if you show up to my house wearing those I will surely give you a treat -- in the form of lead fucking candy corn sprayed down your neck.
***
Novelty Contacts Can be Halloween Horror for Eye Health (USA Today)
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