One of the hometown all-stars who started last night's game was Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez. The self-tanning slugger was gracious enough to hang around for a whole five innings before putting on his suit and conducting postgame interviews, just a mere ten innings before the game's completion.
Where the hell was he, you ask? The drunk Hernia mole is on the case with a plethora of rumors:
- Created 'Fusilli A-Rod' and then sat on it
- Yoga session with DJ AM
- Built a spacious cushion fort in his penthouse
- Late Oompa-Loompa substitute in Broadway version of Wizard of Oz
- Sushi with Nicole Bass
- Played with Dark Helmet's action figures
- Went home to send erotic emails to Papelbon's pregnant wife
- Updated his facebook page with pictures from the game and sent a hug to Jeter
- Humped Josh Hamilton's bat
- Went to get frosted tips on his pubes
- Late night squat workout and sparring session with Serena Williams
- Went to grab some wings with new 'bro' Spencer Pratt
- Zima pong with Carson Kressley
- Played laser tag with his dong
- Teeth whitening blast followed by Moonboots shopping spree (seriously, what was up with those cleats?)
