Since recently switching from Paul O'Neill's psychotically coveted number 21 to the slightly less popular Clemens' 22, relief pitcher LaTroy Hawkins has seen several improvements in his day-to-day life as a New York Yankee.
Here's a list of some things that have already changed for the affable pitcher.
- Fans no longer throwing shit in his face
- Fans no longer throwing shit at his family
- Fans no longer throwing shit at people who know his family
- Fans no longer calling his apartment to tell him they can't wait to throw shit at him and his family
- Stadium security staff no longer filling his car with cement
- Jeter no longer taunting him during his wind-up
- Posada no longer telling the batter exactly what's coming
- Rivera no longer putting his cleats in Jello
- Entrance music no longer the theme from Crispy Critters cereal
- Bob Sheppard no longer introducing him as "that dick who stole Paul O'Neill's number"
- Paul O'Neill no longer standing by Hawkins' locker with his arms sternly folded, watching him dress